Doing a bad behavior that they didn't used to do
Before You Begin
Pause and breathe. Even if this shouldn't be happening... accept that it is and embrace it with composure and calmness.
Calmness is the only way forward because without calm, there is no possibility for receptiveness and connection. Your child won't give to you any more than they see from you.
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Never forget that a strong connection is fundamental, as there will be no correction in them if there is no connection with you.
The Core Problem
This is most often a child's response to experiencing an unsettling change in some area of the his/her life.
What Will Make It Worse
Focusing entirely on the bad behavior and responding with harsh punishment will do nothing to address why this new behavior is happening.
What The Child Needs
1. To identify the cause: Help the child identify triggers or factors that might be influencing the new bad behavior. Understanding the root cause can provide insights for addressing the issue. Provide emotional support and empathy as the child explores the reasons behind their actions.
2. A reminder of the expectations and boundaries: Set clear expectations and boundaries around acceptable behavior. Communicate calmly and assertively, letting the child know the behavior is not acceptable.
3. Positive attention: Provide positive attention and reinforcement when the child displays improved/corrected behavior.
How To Have The Conversation With Your Child
Find a good time to sit with them in a comfortable place that is free of distractions.
Share with them that you have seen a change in their behavior. They have started to do something that isn't good and never used to happen in the past. Tell them that you care about them and think that this is a sign that something is bothering them under the surface.
Next start working with the child on the "What The Child Needs" pointer #1 listed above.
Close the conversation with a calm reminder of the rules around the bad behavior (pointer #2), but don't let it ruin the closeness that was gained in talking with them about what they are going through.
Over the following weeks, address any underlying causes that came up in the conversation that were triggering the bad behavior, and find opportunities to acknowledge their corrected behavior.